Sara Smile… February 24, 2009

Dear Sary,

You have been gone for a little over a year now. I miss you every day.And yet I am still so goddamned pissed at you for leaving the way you did. I don’t understand why you did that. I don’t know if anyone does. If they did, no explanation was given. It doesn’t make it any easier to deal with.

I guess I just really want to know why. Why did you do such a selfish, horrible thing? Why did you not see how many,many people loved you? Why did you feel you had not one person to talk to? Not fucking one? I lived down the street from you. Down the street. You can’t know how bad that made me feel. Still makes me feel,actually. I just never felt comfortable around M. I still don’t. She didn’t seem to care too much for me either. But you can’t really blame her. I was there for the whole T. debacle. Which should have been fine. I should have dealt. Moved passed it. Something. Anything but not see you.

Dude, do you remember that day we followed her to M.’s house? Because we caught her in that lie? C. had been egging you on. We were all hanging out and watching the race, or football. You decided you had to know the truth once and for all. So we filled the cooler with beer and drove to her house. We parked down the street and proceeded to spy on her lying ass. Until it became painfully apparent that she was cheating on you. Then it wasn’t fun anymore and we drove home. We sat up all night talking and listening to music.

We had a lot of fun together, you and I.Oh, the stories I could tell.I try to remember that when it starts to hurt too much. I think about the good times. Going out to dinner at Spondivits with R. Those damn Dallas socks you wore to work just about every day! Verne Troyer. Going next door to Alan’s to get your tattoo AND your piercing.How you would leave me coffee in the mornings if you had to go to work before I did.

I haven’t forgotten one thing about you,Sug. I couldn’t. I just wanted you to know that.To know that one person truly loved you exactly as you were. That you were the best friend a girl could ever ask for.

I guess all that is really left now is for me to finally say goodbye. I hope that you finally found the peace you so desperately needed. I wish I could have been a better friend to you. That is my issue. I want you to know that I will mourn you all the days of my life.

So long, Sug. Be happy.

Me

Apologies… February 20, 2009

I have NO idea why the comments are off on my last post. We are having serious computer issues. My hubs is going to get right on it. I apologize for any inconvenience…

Saving The Drama… February 19, 2009

I will have been at my current job for two years in April. I do love it. But! I just don’t think I am that happy there anymore. My boss is pregnant with her third child, they are *possibly* buying a second store and they have made the most senior person one of two assistant managers. The other manager? Will be brought in. They have no plans on keeping the other assistant manager in house.

And that bothers me. Quite a bit actually. I’m not saying I should have automatically got the job. But someone in the store should have. It is only fair. I just don’t think you can bring someone in two years into being a store and expect them to do the job as well as someone who knows the ins and outs of the place. Just my opinion.

I also don’t really feel like I can ask questions or even present my point of view to my boss right now because she IS pregnant. The whole situation is just really screwed up. I also realize that the economy is in the toilet  and I should be grateful to even have a job. And I am. I just wish the situation could be better than it is. We are having a ton of customer complaints. I truly believe that the majority of them are completely unwarranted. People have been very unhappy with their offers(because their stuff is SHIT!) and as a result they are claiming we(as a staff) are rude. Which is such crap. It just really bothers me. Don’t get me wrong, we can be rude, and we have been. BUT! When we were, we admitted we were and explained why we were. That has just not been the case right now.

I am really kind of torn as to what to do. I have requested next weekend off in order to move(woot!woot!) and I think that will give me a much needed break. If you can call moving a “break”!! I don’t want to do anything rash.

I will think on it for a while and see what I come up with.

Ready… February 16, 2009

I can put up with a lot of things. I have a fairly high level of patience which is now rapidly beginning to run the fuck out. I swore after the last time that I would not be put in this situation again. Ever. I swore I would live on the streets first.  And then someone tried to break into our house. And then our slumlord,er landlord, decided I apparently made the whole thing up. And then he got freaky with us about the rent. So. We moved out. Again. Don’t get me started on how DH called the afternoon of said move to say if we gave him 800$ in cash we could stay. Yeah. Dude is seriously on some crack.

We moved back in with my parents. Gah. We have found another home, we are moving in this weekend,thankyoujesus. Because I cannot take one more second of my nutty mother. Bad things will happen if I have to stay here any longer. She is crazy. Like bat-shit crazy. She told my husband that she has been experiencing “insomnia” after the death of my grandma. She says she is unable to go to sleep until around four in the morning. Yeah. I personally believe it’s because she stays up playing online poker all damn night and doesn’t stumble out of bed until around noon. Or maybe it’s the NAPS she takes at SEVEN ‘O’ CLOCK AT NIGHT. FOR TWO HOURS. Call me crazy, but that might have a little somethin’ to do with it.

Look out sanity, I’m coming home!

The Sickness Is Baaaack… February 11, 2009

I really think this is all totally Pre-k’s fault. And the germy little beasts who ATTEND WHEN THEY ARE SICK. So really that would make it the PARENT’S fault for sending in their preshus chirrens when they are snot infected little hose-beasts.

Damn parents. I oughta go over to their houses and lick every glass in their cupboards. That would show them.

Ding-Dong… February 5, 2009

The bikini wearing bitch is gone. That’s right, her skinny ass was kicked of American Idol last night. I am so very,very glad.

I don’t think she should have made it that far. Her voice was not that great. And frankly, I don’t think her body was all that either. Well, it wasn’t! It is one thing to be cocky when you have mad skillz and the whole package. When you don’t? Then you look like a ho.

I do have to say that my favorite part came after it was all said and done though. Right when she called the one girl “fake”. Um, pot and kettle anyone? But it all worked out in the end.

Karma once again proved her point.

Resolutions, Shmesolutions… February 4, 2009

I decided not to make any New Year’s Resolutions this year for many reasons. Chief among them, I never keep them. So here is what I propose to do instead. I will document the things I would like to accomplish by the end of the year. That way I can update my progress through out the year.

And now, in no particular order, here they are. My goals and dreams for 2009…

1- Learn a new skill. I’m thinking guitar.

2- Go back to school.

3- Develop better eating habits.

4- Lose weight.

5- Watch less crappy tv. Or try really,really hard to.

6- Plant a garden.

7- Get caught up on all my laundry.

8- Spend a day volunteering somewhere with the boys.

9- Learn how to make grilled cheese already. what? I’m perfectly serious.

10- Catch up with all my bloggy friends.

11- Take a vacation.

12- Develop a budget and truly stick with it.

13- Make more time for my friends.

14- Take time for me.

15- Do something I normally would never do.

16- Have a “Date Night” with my husband.

17- Do something new with the boys once a month.

Well, there you have it. My list of things I would like to do/change/learn this year. Some may be trivial.  Some will present quite a challenge. But I am determined to conquer 2009. One way or another.

25 Things! About Me! That Hopefully I Haven’t Mentioned Already! HAHAHAHA! January 29, 2009

To be fair, I wasn’t actually tagged for this Meme. But I do love me a good Meme and I am trying to get back in the habit of posting frequently. I also know three people who have done it. There you have it. And now, without further ado, twenty-five new,exciting,stupendous things that you never wanted to know about me.

1- I can no longer eat salmon. Sadly, salmon is dead to me forever as a direct result of my first pregnancy. I now like sweet potatoes instead.

2- I have been known to occasionally use song lyrics as a sentence. What? Doesn’t everyone?

3- I read anything. Truly. I devour books.

4- I haven’t read Twilight yet.

5- I love to watch the Superbowl even if I don’t like the teams who are playing because I LOVE,LOVE,LOVE the commercials. And the snacky-snacks.

6- My great-great uncle is a sort of well-known artist. We have two of his paintings. His work is unbelievable. I am quite proud.

7- I also own a wonderful painting by another artist, an old family friend, whom my son is named after. Pretty cool,eh?

8- Did I mention I think Chef’s are hot? I mean they actually have to be sorta hot and then their chefy-ness makes them even hotter.

9- I once got “paddled” at a Fetish club just to see what it was all about. I decided I wasn’t missing all that much.

10- I have a pretty high tolerance for pain.

11- I like to make up silly songs. I will also sing said silly songs pretty much at any given time.

12- I like to make people laugh. I want them to be happy when I am around and to feel good about themselves.

13- I am pretty confident about myself now. I so did not used to be. I think maybe that is an age thing.

14- I like scratch-off lottery tickets. I am actually pretty lucky with them. I mainly stick to the 2$ or maybe 3$ ones though. I’m not quite willing to risk 20$ on one yet. Or maybe ever.

15- Still with the cursing. I am making a very serious attempt at watching the potty mouth in front of the boys. Little pitchers and all that…

16- I may still watch The Hills. I will neither confirm nor deny.

17- I will be thirty-five this year and I am totally stoked about it. No, really.

18- I want to learn a new skill this year. I’m not entirely sure what skill yet, but I will let you know.

19- I love sports, but I have NO idea what a triple-double is. Anyone? Bueller?

20- I am jealous that my boss is pregnant with her third child already.

21- Dub is still not potty trained. He is three. I give up.

22- I am trying really hard to let my hair grow because my husband likes long hair, but I fear it may be a losing battle.

23- I like to watch Joel Osteen on Sunday mornings.

24- I refuse to watch scary movies. Of any kind. Ever.

25- My Diddy is still the funniest person I know. My husband is a close second, followed by my Bubba.

Ta-da! Now don’t you feel better? Like we can maybe be BFF’s? No?

I’m okay with that.

What Happens In The Land Of Nod Stays In The Land Of Nod… January 27, 2009

Thursday night begins the new season of Hell’s Kitchen and I can hardly wait. I am so excited that I have begun dreaming about it. Or should I say him? I find chef Gordon Ramsey kinda hot. I think it has something to do with his chefy-ness. Maybe it’s the accent. Who knows? The point is I am having naughty dreams about him.

Take last night for example. Somehow we were introduced by Simon Cowell(WTF?) and neither one of us was married, I was skinnier with my long hair back and one thing led to another…you get the idea. Here is the one(?!) thing that puzzles me. How do I know Simon Cowell? I was thinking it was a direct result of watching waaaay too much American Idol. I can be grateful that I am not dreaming about Ryan Seacrest, I suppose!

I have always had a thing for chefs. I am somewhat of a “foodie”, or I used to be more of one before having the boys. We don’t go out to eat as much as we used to because I tend to cook more. I enjoy making new dishes and experimenting with new ingredients. I am definitely a Food Network kinda girl.

I have to say that I also became an even bigger fan of Gordan Ramsey after watching a show he did on the BBC that involved his wife and children. His wife is rockin’ and their children are adorable. When he is not in the kitchen he is quite gentle and sweet. Which is something we have all seen with the winner’s of any of the challenges on HK.

All in all, I am not really sure why I keep having these dreams. I definitely am not going to knock it! So show me what you got, Chef Ramsey. Er, you know what I mean! Pervy.

24 Reasons I will NOT be watching 24…EVER… January 18, 2009

1- Kiefer Sutherland could not act his way out of a paper bag…

2- Shouldn’t this show be called 76 now? Technically speaking?

3- It looks dumb. And that is really saying something considering I watch trashy television with alarming regularity.

4- Bah. I’m going to stick with numero uno for numbers 4 thru 24. He really is a terrible actor. Dude, every expression is exactly.the.same.