SQUEEEEE!

My e-vite came today. My e-vite came today!Super Suppers here I come! Well, in October anyway!

SQUEEEEEEE!

Since I am so cool, I already RSVP’d. Like right after I finished reading my e-mail.

Seriously.

I am looking forward to meeting everyone.

Now I just need to figure out what to wear…or go shopping. Yeah. Shopping it is!!

SQUEEEEEEE!

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Time to come clean…

I have been avoiding this post for some time now. I couldn’t figure out how to say these simple words… We lost our house.

The foreclosure was final September 4th. We tried everything we could think of to save it, but nothing worked. We didn’t have enough equity to interest any investors and the mortage company’s idea of “help” was to reduce our payment by about forty dollars. And there was still a possibility we would have to pay them an additional three thousand dollars in November. So we let it go. My husband’s credit is ruined. We are still struggling financially. And yet, somehow? I know that we will figure out a way to survive. I am determined to survive. I will not let this break me.

It sounds so easy to say. It’s not. Sometimes I find myself repeating it over and over to myself. Like some ridiculous mantra. And as much as I would like to have a complete nervous breakdown, including curling up on the floor, naked, sucking my thumb, I can’t. Because The Aidan and Quinn need me. I have to keep it together. I also have to finish packing and find a house for us to rent. And if you think it was hard to write that first sentence you would be wrong. Nothing was more difficult than having to tell a real estate agent that she would find a foreclosure on your credit. And to have her look at you with a mixture of pity and something else I can’t even begin to name. Saying those words out loud to a complete stranger was so mortifying. I have never felt more like a failure in my life.

I realize we are one family among so very, very many. And that is sad. I also realize that we are very,very lucky. My husband and I are both healthy and able to work. I do surveys online, sell Southern Living at Home, and am hoping to get a job as a Cater-Waiter-Bartender for the holidays.I also work at a children’s resale store. We have two cars, one of which is paid for. We do not have credit card debt. We have always paid cash. We are not destitute by any means.We just hit a rough patch last fall when my husband lost his job. We never recovered. I am not doing this for sympathy or any reason, except for wanting to be truthful about my life.

We are almost caught up on our bills. Except for the medical bills. Which of course occured in the fall of last year and Mother’s Day. But other than that? We are okay. And I feel much better for having written about this. We have two houses we are trying to choose between. Both are in our price range and about a bajillion times better than where we live now. In the hell-hole,er house, we used to own.

I believe everything happens for a reason. I’m just not sure what this one is yet.

The thrill of victory…and the agony of defeat…

I am a very happy girl after this weekend. Except for two things. One of which pissed me off so badly I am considering sending a nasty letter to ABC/ESPN. Betches…

Sorry, back to the topic at hand. My beloved Trojans kicked some Washington butt on Saturday. I was delirious with joy. UNTIL…one of the aforementioned stations TOOK THE GAME OFF THE AIR IN THE THIRD QUARTER SO WE COULD WATCH FRICKIN IOWA AND WISCONSIN. IOWA AND WISCONSIN. CORN vs CHEESE. Apparently I am still a tiny bit upset. I just do not fathom why THE NUMBER 1 RANKED TEAM IN THE COUNTRY would have their game interrupted by THE NUMBER 9 RANKED TEAMS STUPID ASS GAME. Had that been any other team I promise you that would not have happened. Which also pisses me off. The fact that we don’t get taken seriously. Because we are in the Pac-10. Um, correct me if I am wrong- BUT AREN’T WE CONSISTENTLY WINNING GAMES/CHAMPIONSHIPS?

Then you can all bite me.

The agony of defeat would be the loss my Falcons suffered at the hands of the Carolina Panthers. It was an ugly match. DeAngelo Hall did not have a good day. There were more personal fouls in this game than I can ever remember seeing. And the Cowboys spanked the Bears. And pretty much made them their betch. It was sad.

The Braves won.

My boyfriend did not. But there is still Talladega and Atlanta. Two tracks that he has a pretty good history with. I’m not worried. Besides, there is always next year!!

And that wraps it up. We are experiencing massive Baby Drama at the moment.

JUST JENNY!!- THE MUSICAL…

My best friend wrote a blog on her myspace about how music and songs have affected her life. I know- MySpace. I have recently joined at the urging of one of my best friends from high school. Look Ma, I am cool! All jokes aside, I have actually met up with some friends that I haven’t spoken to in years. So laugh all you want. I do not care.

Back to the topic at hand. I grew up in a fairly musical family. I don’t ever remember a time where there wasn’t music of some sort. My father used to sing in a bluegrass band. Every Tuesday night. If we were lucky we would get to go and hear him sing. I will never forget hearing their friends, Clyde & Mary, sing “Turn the Radio On”. With Clyde playing the mandolin. She had the voice of an angel. I often wondered whatever happened to them. They were fairly old when I knew them as a little girl. I do know I always think of them every time someone tells me to “turn the radio on”.

There was always something on the radio. Or 8-track. Shut it. My mama liked Merle, The Oak Ridge Boys and just about everything in between. I think I knew all the words to the “Y’all Comeback Saloon” before I knew my own name. And it goes without saying that I knew all the words to just about any Merle Haggard song. My daddy was a little more broadminded in his musical scope. We grew up listening to Johnny Cash, Creedence Clearwater, Bob Seeger, The Sons of the Pioneers, and Brook Benton, to name a few.

The eclectic musical educatiion I was exposed to served me well. I love almost every type of music. With a special fondness for Merle and Creedence. As a matter of fact, the song I danced to with my father at my wedding was “The Farmer’s Daughter”. By Merle Haggard. It was a surprise for my diddy. It shook him so much he could barely dance with me. The songs of Merle Haggard have played a huge part of our lives. My parent’s song is ” That’s the Way Love Goes”. One of the best moments of my life, by far, was getting to actually watch them dance to this song. At a concert I bought them tickets for.

It just seems like for every milestone I have faced, there has been some sort of song to mark it. So I give you my list. And probably the short version.

Because, Jesus. We don’t have all damn day!

Salty Dog- Ricky Scaggs
Caroline- Merle Haggard
The Long Black Veil- Lefty Frizzell
Delia- Johnny Cash
At the Hop- Danny and the Juniors
King of the Road- Roger Miller
Blue Moon of Kentucky- Bill Monroe
Missing You- John Waite
Pretty much the entire Tapestry album- thanks, mama!
Joe Cocker.
Bob Seeger- who can choose!
Journey- see above.

And now? My adult stuff.

A Long December- Counting Crowes. Last December was the worst month of my life.
3 am- Our Lady Peace- Not thinking my diddy would make it, and wondering what the hell my bubba would do if that happened.

Drops of Jupiter- Train. The best years of my life. Pre-bebe, of course!
Redemption Song- Bob Marley. Rest in peace, my babe-a. I miss you.
Could You Be Loved- Bob Marley. Seeing my husband dancing around the room, softly singing this song to his newborn son at two in the morning. WHILE I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE SLEEPING!!

The list could go on and on and on. You get the idea. I think we have instilled our love of music in our children. For that I am grateful.

I just want it to be all that it has been for me over the years. The thing that no matter what, I could turn it on and lose myself. I could forget, if just for a moment, all of my troubles and cares.

Who doesn’t need that?

I can’t believe I forgot about this!

So my boyfriend announced his new number yesterday.

88.

Which I more or less expected.

What I did NOT expect? That Bud would drop him like it’s hot. Wha? Instead, they chose Kasey Kahne as their new boy. BAH.

We have The National Guard and Mountaind Dew Amped.

Woopty-freakin-do…

I am happy about the number though. I hope he will be happier. And maybe have what it takes -support-wise- to win a championship next year.

Go Dale Jr.!!!!!

Going out…

Tonight, for the first time in not-so-recent memory I am going out with my best friend. Well one of ’em anyway. We are going to see Blue October(her fave band-EVAH!) at the Masquerade.

God. The Masquerade. What a rush of memories. Most of them good. They involve countless hours dancing to fetish music and drinking Nuclear Ice Tea’s. Don’t ask!It was an interesting time in my life to say the least. One that I do not regret.

But I am feeling so weird about going back to a place that the me of now no longer belongs in. And to be truthful? I have no desire to. That’s not who I am anymore.

The me of now is simply going to see a band with her friend.

Rock On!