The M.I.L. Diaries…

When my husband and I first began our married life together, his family was not a part of our life. My husband had had a falling out with them years prior to our ever even meeting. They missed our wedding. And even the birth of our first child. I all but begged him to contact them and at least let them know about the baby. He finally agreed and called his mom at work. She was beside herself. She had read about the wedding, but had no idea about the baby. She asked if she could come over after work. I’m amazed she didn’t leave work and come right then!

I was so excited. I was going to have a mother-in-law. I had asked him to ask her if I could call her “Mom”. She was so excited she started to cry. I was also terribly nervous. What if she didn’t like me? What then?

She came over and was just so wonderful, I could hardly believe it. She oohed and awed over her first grandson. She took about eleventy-jillion pictures. No lie. It was perfect. We made plans to meet the great-grandparents and his younger brother the next weekend. That went great too! Everything was perfect. I loved his grandparents. His grandma especially. I lost my grandma last year. Having her in my life has really been a blessing. The last four years have truly been special. My friends were so jealous that I had this fabulous M.I.L. And then something happened to change all that.

She became nuttier than a fruitcake. Seriously. We moved last weekend. Keep in mind that she has become bitchier and bitchier for about the last six months or so. Last weekend took the fucking-proverbial-cake. All weekend I kept hearing little snide comments . I let them go. I walked away. I even turned the other cheek. Until Sunday. I had finally had enough. She had my husband so upset that we got into the world’s stupidest argument over NOTHING. I finally told him just how I felt. He apologized and told me I was right and that he should have known that all along. She was snooping through our mail, under the guise of “helping” us to pack. I was LIVID. I won’t mention all the comments she made to my husband. Or most of what she said to me the next day. I will tell you that I have never been talked to like that in my entire life. Or screamed at, I should say. I have never been made to feel more like a worthless mother in my whole life as a mama. And I said the one thing I made myself promise NOT to say in retaliation. I feel bad. It was a really ugly thing to say. In my defense, I just could NOT take it anymore. And I’m sorry, it takes a lot to really make me angry. But when you make me that angry? I will instinctively say the one thing guaranteed to hurt you the most. And I did.

Now we are no longer speaking to each other. Which is fine by me. I don’t need any fake people in my life. I told my husband that she is welcome to see her grandsons whenever she wants. But I will be damned if I am taking them to see her. As far as I am concerned she can kiss my sorry-mama-ass.

Or not. I no longer care what she thinks.


2 thoughts on “The M.I.L. Diaries…

  1. TammyK says:

    Awww Jenny I am very sorry to hear that you had this falling out. I too have a completely nutty MIL. She’s an alcoholic and we’ve had 2 rather major falling outs. It’s a sad reality of life that some people live to make others miserable. After 15 years my MIL and I have a working understanding. She knows not to shove to hard or I’ll shut her out for the 3rd and final time… and I don’t go out of my way to do anything for her. all the time and effort comes directly from her 100%

    My husband gave up a long time ago. He really doesn’t speak to either of his parents.

  2. Jenny H. says:

    Tammyk- Wow. Just wow. I am so sorry that you are dealing with that. It’s hard. I feel bad because of the boys. But I am damn sure NOT going out of my way for her. Ever again. I have never been spoken to like that in my life.

    The worst part? The boys heard her yelling at me. I can forgive anything. But not that.

    I guess as mama’s we just do what has to be done.

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