The One With The Derby…

Today was my very first experience with the Pinewood Derby. It was interesting, to say the least. Lots of build-up and tons of excitement. Adults included! Let’s not forget about the cake either. You know how I feels about the cake…but that’s neither here nor there. The real story lies in the derby cars themselves. Or should I say the father’s of the boy’s who had derby cars? You be the judge…

My understanding of the theory behind the Pinewood Derby is a bonding experience between parent and child. A fun experience with your chirrens. But, and you knew there had to be one. The kids are supposed to do the majority of the work themselves. Should I repeat that? THE KIDS ARE SUPPOSED TO DO THE MAJORITY OF THE WORK THEMSELVES.

Wanna guess where this is going? Yeah. It ain’t pretty. Don’t get me wrong, I’m as competitive as they come. But this is for the kids! When you bring in your “son’s” car and go through registration and weigh in, and then bring it to the table where it will sit under my watchful eye(untouched by anyone!) and then actually have the gall to ask me if it really has to stay on the table because you worked so hard on it. C’mon, man. Really? Every single adult in that gym knew that your son had nothing to do with that car. Which is really sad because there’s an adult category. Seriously.

What are you teaching your children? You have to win no matter what? If you can’t do something, don’t worry, Dad will? Good job. I suppose you expect them to always get a trophy too, eh? Too bad that isn’t how it works in the real world. You are setting your children up for failure. And for what? A plastic trophy?

I guess I must be crazy. My children came up with their designs and their dad and grandpa cut them out. They sanded them. They painted them, with very little help from me. Were they perfect in every way? Not even close. Did they win any trophies? Nope. Not a one. Did they have the best day ever(their words!)? Damn skippy they did. And that means more to me than any trophy or award.

Which is the entire point.


Potty Training 3.0

Kind of a lame ass title, I know. But it was better than Bub: This Child is Going to be the Death of Me. And there you have it.

So clearly you can see where this blog post is headed. We’ve reached that super fun time in your parental life also known as Potty Training. Or as I often refer to it, The Seventh Circle of Hell. Because really, it is. At least in my house. My children are not easily trained. Nub and Dub were both almost four before either of them were trained. Bub is proving to be much like his bubbas in that respect. He does NOT want to potty in the toilet. And we have three bathrooms! He will not potty in his chair, he will not potty any where. Seventh. Circle. Of. Hell.

So I have decided that he is simply going to just do it. No more pull-ups because I’m tired of buying the damn things. I’m tired of changing them. So he is gonna learn to go potty like a big boy. Period. I don’t care how many tears there are. His or mine. Harsh? Perhaps. But believe me when I tell you we have tried it all. Cheerios? Yep. Candy? You betcha. Bribery? Damn skippy. Tears? Buckets and rivers, y’all. Most of them mine. Special equipment? Absofrickinlutely. Tried. It. All.

Hence, the putting underwear on and just going for it portion of the program, thankyouverymuch. We’re not having a lot of success at this point. But it’s early! Day 1! It’ll get better, right? Or easier? Keep in mind I’m quite fragile at the moment and base your responses accordingly.

Guess it’s a good thing I bought that seven pack of underwear, eh?

Heart and Soul…

Yesterday was a terrible day for Nub. And the rest of us. I was feeling pretty low and decided to pour my heart out on my blog. It took me an hour. AN HOUR. I cried. I erased some of it. Then put it back. And erased it yet again. Just when it was all perfectly dramatical I hit publish.

And it disappeared. At which point I cried some more. I don’t think I can recreate it. The moment has passed. And I’m not feeling it today, so I don’t think it would be the same. Sigh…

It did make me feel better though. I also realized just how much I miss writing on my blog. Yes, I know. I’ve said that eleventy bajillion times before. At least. Doesn’t make it any less true. Trying to find time to write hasn’t really been a priority. I’ve been busy with the boys and dealing with Nub’s Asperger’s the best way I can. I’m in Mama Mode hardcore. Which is all well and good. But I need to be in Me Mode too. Finding a way to carve out a little slice of time for myself needs to be something I do every day. Even if it’s only a few minutes.

I think it would make everyone happier in the long run.

The Fambly Bucket List 2012…

Not to be confused with my own personal, rather small, Bucket List. Now that we’ve cleared that all up…and we are all on the same page I shall commence with the Fambly Bucket List. I totally borrowed this idea from my friend Zoot, not knowing at the time it was from her. I kept thinking the girl in the picture looked awfully familiar though. My ever astounding powers of observation are pretty magnificent, no?

1- Go to the Farmer’s Market

2- Have a water balloon fight.

3- Have a water gun fight.

4- Go to the dollar movies.

5- Name chalk art photos.

6- Go to a baseball game.

7- Camp out.

8- Sign up for the Summer Reading Program at the library.

9- Take a hike.

10- Make friendship bracelets.

11- Catch fireflies.

12- Watch fireworks.

13- Make homemade popsicles.

14- Go on a picnic.

15- Go to DQ for some ice cream.

16- Go to an outdoor concert.

17- Make a Summer Cake.

18- Go to the BEACH.

19- Visit the Ice Cream truck.

20- Star gaze.

21- Sparklers.

22- Play frisbee.

23- Tye dye our own t-shirts.

24- Fly a kite.

25- Plant some sunflowers.

26- Watch the 4th of July Parade.

27- Temporary tattoos.


And I think that oughta keep us busy for a little while.

Summer Update!

Wow. I suck. I’m not really sure where the time has gone, but I really did mean to post an update about Nub’s Asperger’s and various other things. None of which I remember. So you’ll just have to take my word on it that they were cool. And fun. The best laid plans and all that, I suppose. Gah. Anyhoo, on to the updates…

We officially received a diagnosis of Asperger’s Syndrome the first part of May. And while it didn’t really come as a big shock to us, it was still difficult to see the words in black and white for the first time. It was also suggested that we switch Nub to a Gluten Free diet in order to help with his lack of focus. I met with the pediatrician and he agreed. I’m sorry, but I can’t put my eight year old son on psychotropic drugs. He’s EIGHT. So not an option. Thankfully, his pediatrician and his team at school agree with us. So that is one less thing to worry about. I’ve been reading(we all have actually, grandparents included!) and doing tons of research on Asperger’s and gluten free diets. I feel pretty comfortable with both, as of right now anyway. Without sounding like I’m tooting my own horn, I am a pretty good cook and I enjoy it immensely. So I’m looking forward to new recipes and the challenge of creating yummy new dishes for us to try. As for Nub? He seems pretty matter of fact about having Autism. Which is good. It doesn’t change anything about who he is as a person. He is still my same sweet, funny boy. He just sees things a bit differently than we do. And that’s fine too. We signed him up for baseball(and Dub played soccer) at our local rec center. At first we were a little worried about how he would do. He LOVED it! And he was pretty good at it too. His coaches were amazing and so patient and kind. They won only two games, but that didn’t stop him from having a blast at each game. He was so excited to receive the final game ball for Most Improved Player. You could have seen the smile on his face from the moon! I cried(and I may have teared up a wee bit whilst typing this). All in all it was quite a successful season. And we look forward to doing it all over again in the Fall.

Moving on to other news…I am officially the proud mama of a third grader AND a first grader. ZOIKS! I don’t even want to think about the fact that in just two short years I will be completely chirren free during the day. Lalalalalalalalala, I am not thinking about you Worst Day Ever. Seriously. Shut up. Dub is VERY pleased with himself because he is not a baby anymore. He is in first grade. Serious bidness, y’all. And Bub is just happy to have his “Bubbies” to play with every day. We have lots of fun stuff planned for the Summer, including a trip to the BEACH. Which is desperately needed right about now. I can’t remember the last time we actually went on vacation. Sad. But totally true. Although I also can’t remember what I did last week. Gah.

So there you have it. An actual post. From me. I know, right?! And now if you’ll excuse me, I have some Curious George to watch…

School Days…

I picked up the registration forms for Dub to attend preK this afternoon. He will be going to the same place as Nub. To say that Dub is thrilled is putting it mildly. Mama? Not so much.

He asks me EVERY. DAY. if it’s “next day” that he will be going to school. And every day I have to break his heart by telling him that it isn’t time yet. He is so cute. And so ready to go to big boy school…just like his bubba.

I can’t help but feel a little sorry for myself. I’ve been home with him for most of his life. He’s my little pal, my helper. We snuggle all the times. Well, maybe not quite so much now that he is a big boy, but still. Where does the time go? I’m pretty sure I just brought him home from the hospital last week. Next thing you know he will be leaving for college!

Gah. At least I still have Bub around to distract me. He won’t be leaving me to go to school any time soon. At least I don’t think he will…but you never know with kids.

The Great Turtle Rescue of 2009…

Well, the title may be a bit misleading. It was more like a brief foray,but anyhoo I shall commence with the telling…

On Friday, Nub’s school let out early. For conferences(which is a whole ‘nother post.Trust me.) and teacher workday’s. Normally he rides the bus. However,I decided to pick him up from school. Dub thought that was cool and he came with. We waited our turn in line,chatted with some mom’s, and sang along to some Veggie Tales. Nub got in the van and we headed home.

His school is really not that far from our house. The road outside our subdivision has recently undergone some construction and reconfiguring. Which truly baffles me because how they did it makes no sense ,and not much safer than it was. But what do I know? I don’t work for the DOT. As we prepare to turn down our new street I notice a turtle bravely making its way across the road. Nub catches sight of it out his window as I carefully flip a u-turn and turn my hazards on. I park the car and get out to pick the turtle up and put it on the other side of the road. This other car has stopped too and the guy tells me I need to “pick it up and put it in the grass”,because” that turtle can’t climb the curb”. Thank you, Einstein. I attempt to pick up said turtle and the dang thing just takes off! That sucker is really booking it. I finally pick it up,after his/her little head and legs go in the shell, and I am holding it out in front of me when it lets loose with a little defensive urine! Dude, here I am trying to save your turtle hide and you are trying TO PEE ON ME? Not cool. I get to the grass,waaaay on the  other side of the curb, and put the beast down. In the meantime, two or three cars have all stopped to watch the Great Rescue. I cross the street and get back into my van. My children are properly impressed with their mama. Although they did want to bring that turtle home. But I said no.

You gotta draw the line somewhere. I will rescue them, but I am not bringing them home. Especially not one that tried to hose me down with urine!